Monday, October 24, 2011


I asked k man what he learned at preschool today and he responded ''I just learned'' and ran away. Is this what conversations with my son are bound to be like?

little miss attitude

She tends to be a little dramatic about life. This particular moment she did not want her hair done. I have a feeling life is going to be interesting. wonderful, yet infused with attitude... looking forward to it.

fall - finally

This makes me happy. :)

Sunday, October 23, 2011

my heart is sad.

I was already having a bad day, muddling about feeling bad for myself and how none of my pants fit and the house is a mess and how so and so is a better photographer or has better hair or... you get the idea.

It was a pity day, and no one stands in my way on one of those days.

Then I read on face book about a friend of mine that past away in her sleep. She was young, and a mom. I was not super close to her, but I had interacted enough with her that I could still hear her voice when I found the news. I can still see her face and I can still remember the very last time that I saw her.

She was pregnant and had a heart condition. Her last doctors appointment was apparently very positive. The saddest part is that she left behind a husband and a beautiful three year old. I cannot help but let my heart reach out to them and let my mind wonder how horrible that would be. What would my own little family do if I died. Needless to say, my heart is sad, VERY heavy and sad.

I am not going to lie, I am sad, and angry and I even asked WHY? a few times. She was an AMAZING mother and one of the nicest people I have ever met. She was so GOOD, and the world needs good. Why would our Father in Heaven take something so good from this world that is so filled with bad. I cannot answer those questions, but I found SOME peace in the fact that our Heavenly Father knows what he is doing, there is a plan and he doesn't take someone in their sleep unless he meant to. 

1 corinthians 15:55 "O Death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?"

I believe this scripture with all my heart...We believe that because of the atonement of Jesus Christ, death should have no sting. We should be happy for our friends who pass on to live with their Father in Heaven... But I cannot help but feel sadness and fear. I have faith, but I also have fear, I thought that was not possible, maybe I just don't have enough faith?

My heart is sad. 

Wednesday, October 19, 2011


I love living so close to the ocean. We spent the weekend at the coast with jared's brother and his wife. It was tons of fun. I really love where we live.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

first pony tail

This pic was actually from a while ago, and her hair is way longer now, but I just didn't want to forget her first (of many I am sure) Pony tail. I love you baby girl, please don't grow up to fast. 

Wednesday, October 05, 2011

i love it.

I am loving this weather. I love hearing the rain as i fall asleep. I love wearing a sweatshirt. I love the cool wind and the rain drops on my head. I love seeing the dark clouds. I love when my babies wear fleece sleepers. I love the smell of the clean crisp air. I love that it means its almost Halloween and thanksgiving. i love the smell of my car heater. I love the way the very first rain drop feels on my hand. I love the rain. So glad its back.

a confession and an insight.

I am a little ashamed to admit this, but feel it necessary to write down an insight I had that I don't want to forget...

We have been HORRIBLE at having Family Home Evening
(if you are a rock-star at this, please do not comment telling me how horrible I am or how awesome you are. I already feel bad enough about it.) 

Each week passes and I feel more and more guilty that we didn't take a few minutes once a week to sit down and have a formal home evening lesson. I have tried in the past, but fail miserably every time. I get overwhelmed with all the ideas out there.

The kids scream and run and play and it is a disaster every time.  

But this is how it went last night.

I wanted to talk about who the Prophet and his councilors are. We have been working really hard on this lately. I wanted to look at each picture, tell his name and birth day and other facts about him and then talk about what he talked about in the most recent General Conference. Easy enough right... WRONG. It was a mess and I wanted to cry from the very start. 

But then, I had a GENIUS idea that can only be explained by the workings of the spirit...

Put the pictures on the wall tell Kman to run as fast as he can and  find the picture of the prophet, then have him bring it back. Then I had him run "as fast as you can" and get the picture of Eyering (the first councilor) and so on. Then we said prayer. Wham bam we were done. 

He is 3 years old. I cannot expect him to sit through a big long lesson. I need to be more creative and think of things on his level. FHE is not about learning as much as you can in a quick lesson once a week. It is about consistently being together as a family and focusing on gospel topics. Coming together, feeling the spirit, showing my children that I love the gospel etc. I was going about it wrong and that is why I got discouraged and therefore never had Family Home Evening. 

My goal is to be more consistent, and SIMPLE with our Family Home Evenings. 

we don't go enough...

We definitely take living so close to the coast for granted. We are just too busy to drive an hour to see some water. But it is nice to have an excuse to finally go. Aunt Ali came to visit which was awesome and then we drove to the beach. It was kinda cold and overcast, but I don't mind. So glad we got to go. 

Aunt Ali loves her niece and nephew, that is for sure. 

Sunday, October 02, 2011

what do you do when it 90 degrees

Don't mind us.. were at the river.